How to be a Best Selling Author

Ever wonder what these authors did to win the moniker of “best-selling?” Some of them topped the NY Times Best Seller’s list. That’s one way to qualify, but it’s also the hard way. It’s actually much easier than you think and involves only a few simple steps.

1. Write a book about an obscure topic that few others have written about, or decide what makes you, as an author, unique.

2. Sell one copy of your book.

Case in point…this website has named my first book Elvis and the Blue Moon Conspiracy as one of their Moon Hoax Best Sellers. And they would be correct. Since very few books have been written about the moon hoax, mine would automatically qualify as one of the best sellers.

I wish I would have thought of that! I would have called myself a best-selling author long ago.

See how easy it is?

Are you the only author in your neighborhood? That makes you the neighborhood’s best-selling author. Forget “the neighborhood” and just go with “best-selling author.”

Did you write a book about the injuries you sustained in your car accident? I’ll bet no one else did. That makes it the best-selling book about your car accident.

Did you write a sci-fi novel that takes place on the figment-of-your-imagination planet of Zoobonk? That’s a best-seller about Zoobonk!

Are you the only author between the ages of 43 and 45 in your city? Hello best-selling author!

As you can see, being a best-selling author has nothing to do with how many copies you’ve sold, as long as you’ve sold at least one copy. It’s purely a matter of technicalities. Just think about what makes you or your book unique and then call yourself a best-selling author!

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2 Responses to How to be a Best Selling Author

  1. DLKeur says:

    That’s unethical because it’s misleading to the reading public, Mark. It might be the way the marketers see it, but, in my book, it’s false advertising and cheap opportunism.

  2. mmcginty says:

    I agree completely, but people do this all the time.

    This is why, when you encounter someone who claims to be a best-selling author, you should ask “best-selling, how?”

    There is a level of sarcasm to my post and I hope you’re able to read into it. Do you really think selling one copy of a book is grounds to call it a best-seller?

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